Why do I still care so much? Why do I still let you make me feel like shit? I already think so low of myself and now you think the same and it kills me. Why do I let it? I'm tired of crying all the time. I'm tired of feeling like nothing all the time. I'm tired of hating myself. I'm tired of faking all the laughs and all the smiles. I don't even know who I'm trying to fool more. Everyone else or myself? I hate that I'm chasing something that doesn't exist and probably never will. I want it more then anything, though. I just want to be happy again. I'm working towards a solution, I just don't know how to get there. I'm so lost and I fear I'll never find my way out.